The Four Walls of Shame
I was praying the other morning and God gave me a picture I'd like to share with you concerning shame. Shame may not be a particularly pressing issue in your life, or it may be consuming you. Either way, I believe this picture is helpful in understanding shame and the effect it has, and that ultimately God wants us to be free of shame in our lives.
The picture I saw was one of a deep pit, dark and narrow. Making up the sides of this pit were four brick walls. They were not natural stone; this was not a pit that had naturally formed in the landscape, rather it had been constructed. I was at the bottom of this pit, looking up at a far off picture square framed view of light above me. This square of light was the only view point I had. The feeling of the pit was one of loneliness, despair and isolation.
Each of the walls had been constructed, and stood to represent an aspect of shame in our lives. The first wall was guilt. Often shame has it's route in something tangible, a feeling of guilt that we carry. This may be because of something we have done, or it may be something done to us. But either way we feel guilt.
The second wall was lies. We may have feelings of guilt because of an experience or action, but shame often starts to deepen because of lies. Satan is excellent at telling lies. In fact, he's the master lie-teller. He's the father of lies! He takes things that we've done, or things that have happened to us, twists them and elaborates on them until the feeling of shame we feel is based more on the lie than on the original feeling of guilt. Satan's ultimate goal is to make us identify with the guilt we feel, so much so that it becomes part of who we are. Rather than guilt being felt about an action or experience, it becomes merged with us so that we are shameful! This leads to isolation, as we separate ourselves off from those around us, which only increases feelings of shame and despair.
The third wall is hiddenness, closely linked to lies and isolation. The more we are infected with the lies of Satan, the more likely we are to withdraw and not talk about the way we're feeling with others. This is exactly where Satan wants you! Withdrawn and isolated, not processing what you're going through with others, and feeling trapped.
The last wall is pain. Pain can be a powerful blocker. It can cause us to shut down our feelings, close ourselves off to others, lose trust, become bitter and resentful, and steal away hope. Pain can start with an experience, but solidify in our lives as the pit of shame deepens and the other walls only reinforce the feelings we have inside.
Imagine being stuck at the bottom of this pit, looking up at the small square of light in the distance. These four walls, guilt, lies, hiddenness and pain, narrow our view point and limit our perspective. Instead of being able to see life outside of this pit, our view point is determined by the pit. This only strengthens the walls around us, and plays in to the hands of Satan who wants to keep us in that place of narrowed vision, limited perspective and darkness. Without rushing on, perhaps close you eyes and recognise the way these four walls operate in our lives. We can all be affected by them at times, but this is not God's plan for us. These walls have been constructed around us by Him, they are not how God sees us and they are not His work.
What solution can there be then to shame? Dig yourself out? This will likely only deepen the problem. Try and climb? The walls are steep and offer no help or hand holds. Sleep on it? When you open your eyes, those four walls are still standing. As Paul says in Romans 7:24-25 'What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord!' Jesus is our way out. Jesus is our rescuer! He tears down the walls, dealing with our guilt through His blood, His atoning sacrifice. He silences the lies and the accusations of Satan by speaking His truth over us; "You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free" John 8:32. He comes alongside as a friend and comforter, not ashamed to call us brothers (Hebrews 2:11), and He brings us into His church where we can find support and strength through relationship and fellowship with other believers. Finally, He has carried our pain on the cross, "Surely He took on our infirmities and carried our sorrows; yet we considered Him stricken by God, struck down and afflicted. But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed." Isaiah 53:4-5. Healing has been made possible, healing of body, soul, mind and spirit, as we receive the finished work of the cross in to our lives by faith.
As the walls of shame come tumbling down, Jesus reaches in to the darkness and draws us in to His light, His presence. Here there is only grace, forgiveness, truth, comfort and peace. Jesus is waiting with a strong arm to pull us in to this place of freedom. We don't need to work anything up, or work anything out, we only need respond to His grace and truth with an open heart. I pray that you would experience freedom today, that shame's walls would come tumbling down and you would see the loving face of Jesus as He draws you in to His grace.